Walking by Faith, Not by Sight

Phillip Edward Van Lear’s 55-year career as an actor also includes stints as a director, producer, writer, and corporate spokesperson. But when his middle school speech teacher first suggested he try acting to curb his rambunctious behavior, he had the perfect 13-year-old-boy answer: “I don’t wanna!”

The Baptist church in Aurora, Illinois, that Phillip, his mother, and his brother attended gave him a surprising amount of experience in front of an audience. “All of those Sunday school teachers and VBS teachers who drilled us on Bible verses also gave us little speeches that we would have to stand up in front of the entire congregation on certain Sundays to present,” he says.

“My mother, God rest her soul, had impeccable speech,” Phillip recalls. “She’d say to me, ‘No, say it right! Enunciate. Articulate. Hit those consonants!’”

Intro to acting

In high school, a still-rambunctious Phillip sneaked into a rehearsal of the school’s production of Arthur Miller’s The Crucible. He saw two Black students in the cast, including a young Johnny Lee Davenport, who would go on to a successful acting career.

“I sat there in the back of that theater watching them go through their rehearsal. I still get chills when I talk about it,” he says. “And I said to myself, That’s what I want to do!”

Over the next five decades, Phillip would become one of the most prolific Chicago-based actors, appearing in dozens of stage productions and directing more than 100 of them. He would also appear in more than 40 films and television series, including Boss, Chicago Code, and a 21-episode role as corrections officer Louis Patterson in Prison Break.

Throughout his career, Phillip’s I-don’t-wanna tendencies continued. “I ran,” Phillip says. “I ran from the Lord for so many years, you know? I received Jesus in my heart when I was 13. But the world got hold of me by the time I was 16 or 17. I still attended church. I was there every Sunday, oftentimes hung over from Saturday night.”

As Phillip’s career advanced, his faith walk retreated. He fell into addictions and destructive behaviors. By 2006, he had been married and divorced twice. Even more challenges were on his horizon.

Turning a blind eye

During an eye exam in 2000, Phillip was diagnosed with open angle glaucoma. Left untreated, the condition can lead to permanent vision loss.  “I was prescribed a couple of eye drops,” he says, “and because I was so steeped in my sin and so arrogant, I said—yeah, whatever, my eyes are fine.

“So, compliancy? Not at all! Then in 2008 or 2009 I went back, and I got my first vision field test [an assessment of peripheral vision]. I could tell that I was actually losing vision,” Phillip says. He was still on the run from God when he married Heather in 2009. The couple have three children: Lucas, Lilly, and Lacey.

Phillip struggled with addictions, mental health issues, and what he calls “disobedient, emotionally abusive” behaviors. As his marriage began to crumble, Heather gave him an ultimatum: Get help or else.

He had been to mental health counseling in his previous marriages, but his acting skills always kicked in once the session began. “It was easy to act when you’re in the office,” he says.

This time was different. In the psychiatrist’s office, Phillip opened up about his addictions for the first time. “I grew up in a Christian, conservative Baptist family, but we didn’t talk about ‘heart’ issues. We talked about putting on a good face and keeping our private matters private,” he says.

After listening to Phillip and asking pointed questions, the doctor told him something he could hardly believe. “She said, ‘On a scale of one to 10, your depression is at a nine.’ Then she said, ‘On a scale of one to 10, your anxiety is at about an 8.5. This is not unusual for men, but it’s especially not unusual for Black men of a certain age.’”

No more hiding

Prescriptions helped Phillip with his symptoms, but for nearly two more years he continued destructive behaviors. “I was still being abusive emotionally to Heather. I was still chasing women, and that didn't really change until 2014 when Heather had finally had enough,” he says. “She called my oldest son, who was smart enough to call my small group leader.

“It just so happened that that night I was at small group. My son called Dave, my small group leader, during small group, and Dave said, ‘I have to take this call.’ He went into the kitchen, took the call, came back, and told everybody in the room about the call.”

Phillip describes it as “one of the toughest moments I’ve ever had because it was one of the most honest moments I had had in decades. There was no more hiding. I finally said, ‘God, I'm done.’  I'm done because this is killing my wife. I’m not being the father I should be to my other children, let alone the three children that Heather and I have.”

Calling Karl and Crew

As Phillip recommitted his life to the Lord and to his marriage, he and Heather became involved in a gospel-centered church. Home during the day due to his acting schedule, Phillip started listening to Moody Radio, particularly Karl and Crew. “You leave God’s Word on long enough,” he says, “and that started softening my heart.”

Occasionally, Phillip would call or text Karl and Crew in response to a question or a subject, and he became a favorite of the show. “It was just very obvious to us that Phillip had gone through a lot of pain and brokenness,” host Karl Clauson says, “and he was a humble, teachable guy, as God would have it.”

Karl even invited Phillip to meet him for breakfast downtown. “It was a sweet time, and we connected in a deep and meaningful way,” Karl says.

“I just love this guy so much,” he continues. “He’s just a true-blue brother and a delight to have around here. Part of our Boom Crew, that’s what he is. I’m a big believer in this guy. If we could have more Phillips, we could see a revolution in this world!”

A master’s from Moody

As Phillip continued listening to Moody Radio, he kept hearing about Moody Bible Institute. “By 2017 I thought maybe I should go to Moody. I had two or three failed attempts at getting my master's degree done. I said to Heather, ‘Honey, I’m going to do it. I'm going to apply!’”

By the time Phillip began classes at Moody Theological Seminary in January of 2018, his vision loss was significant. “I had lost probably 80 percent of vision in my left eye, and I probably had 60 percent vision remaining in my right. I had had five surgeries on my right eye and one or two on my left,” he says.

“Moody was great,” he continues. “The Student Resource Center’s disability services found so many accommodations for me. Dr. Bill Thrasher was my head professor in the department of Spiritual Formation and Discipleship.  He is a prayer giant.”

Great Commission training

It took Phillip a semester before he realized why God had led him to Moody. “God doesn’t call the prepared; He prepares the called, right?” he says. “That following fall when I was sitting in Dr. Winfred Neely’s class on ‘Communicating Biblical Truth,’ the Holy Spirit just came and hit me up in the middle of my forehead. This is why! [Moody] prepares us to go out and to do the Great Commission! That’s why I’m here!”

In 2021, Phillip took his master’s in Biblical Spiritual Formation and Discipleship back into the world of show business. Continuing to act and produce, he felt God’s lead to “go into all the world.” He says, “God basically just said, ‘Okay, tell other people that you know Me and that you are following Me, that you have come back, turned around, and given your life back to Me. You tell people that.’

“In my work, I would boldly proclaim my faith on sets, and all of a sudden I get these crew members and other actors saying, ‘You’re a believer? So am I!’ I never knew that. Some of these people I had known for 20 years or more.”

Counting the cost

While Phillip’s boldness and convictions opened new relationship doors, it closed others. In 2022 he had just signed a contract with Disney to be an acting coach on a new kids’ show based in Chicago when he learned that the show might push gender and sexuality lifestyles that Phillip could not support. He contacted the executive who had just hired him.

“I said, ‘Please tell me, is this something that we’re going to be doing with our show?’ And to his credit, he said, ‘Yeah, we are. We’re committed to this.’ I told him, ‘I can’t be part of that. My faith, my testimony is more to me than this job.

“He didn’t say that he respected my opinion. He just said, ‘I understand the choice you’re making.’ And that cost me. My agent that I’ve had for years dropped me. Word spread throughout Chicago, and no agencies touched me after that.”

Moving ahead

Phillip is still without an agent, but it hasn’t stopped him from practicing the craft he loves, including acting on stage and writing for television. Phillip has been working on an idea for a series called Knights of Chicago that weaves together Arthurian legend and the modern-day Chicago police force.

In 2024 Camelot Studios—a logical fit—expressed an interest. “If the contracts are signed this spring, we'll start writing this summer with our writer friends from Chicago and Los Angeles. The studio head has asked us to write 30 episodes, which is basically three seasons. Then we would start filming in 2026.”

Phillip is committed to keeping the contemporary story connected to some of the ancient themes. “I have to make sure that this story stays true to what the creed of the knights is: the love of God, the love of country, the love of family, and the love of what they do as part of the knighthood.”

His eyesight has continued to degrade, and Phillip currently has only three percent of his vision in one eye. But he remains active in his church and connected to his family. “I lead the men’s ministry at Harvest Bible Chapel’s Aurora campus,” he says. “I have six grandchildren and am expecting my seventh this coming July!”

Phillip is thrilled and honored to be a patient advocate for the Glaucoma Research Foundation and for Alcon’s research and development of glaucoma treatments. He has spoken at medical events about early detection and cutting-edge treatments.

Never 'Why me?'

Despite the loss of his eyesight, multiple surgeries, and even bouts with cancer, in many ways Phillip sees things more clearly than he ever did. “Since 2018 when I went to Moody, there has been one physical thing after another, after another, after another. Yet my life has never been better. Never.

“It is a dichotomy. It is that ‘upside-down kingdom’ that God promises, that by giving we get, by dying we live. Heather and I never once said, ‘Why me?’ We’ve said, ‘What do You want me to do, Lord? How do You want me to glorify You? Who do You want me to talk to? Where do You want me to go?’”